Daily Operation

Lesson Learned By Ugly Dad

Pre-Ellison/post-impregnation, I remember distinctly reading an article about always being keenly aware of your outfits in photos or when cameras are present because your legacy in photos, sometimes comes down to your wardrobe. Not great news for me. I hate ties, don’t tuck in my shirts, usually have a beard tha’ts growing into my chest hair (and only shave it because I have to keep a job) and prefer sneakers to loafers. Visually, I’m not very well-kept. It’s not in my programming. It’s not that I don’t come from sharp lookers. My father looks great in a tux. My Granddad Ed was a sharp dresser. Granddaddy looks fantastic in a suit. I’m the last rung in the disintegration of good looking Wyrick men…like a reversion back from homosapien to mongoloid cave man. Look at the lineage I come from here. Granddad Ed Wyrick set a high bar for handsome.¬†

I took this article to heart. I thought, “You know, they’re right. I should dress better. I should aspire to look nice for photos with Ellison. I owe it to her. I don’t want to appear like some thug or high school dropout.”

All good in principle.

I recently went to a funeral in the family. I opted to not wear a tie claiming that it was “just too hot” for a tie. I went for a lay-up instead. Representative collar, slacks. shirt tucked in, dark shoes. I went solo with Ellison in tow. The truth is that I could’ve arrived in an orange jumpsuit and no one would’ve known the difference. It was like I wasn’t even there. Truth is, in our family, I’m third in line behind Ellison and my lovely wife. By the time you get to me, it’s like I’m just a table chair that Ellison sits on. Just make sure you wear clothing. Other than that, no one notices. Not that I’m hurt by it. My daughter’s beautiful. It’d be a concern if I was better looking than my daughter. It’s just that the prettier she is, the uglier I am.

Just don’t show up naked.


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