The Byford Files

The Almighty Thank List

Man, I gotta crazy list this year. Lots to be thankful for. Starting with this little bug. Ellison Jayne…one of the greatest.

(Here, I left the computer because of her Linda Blairish screams from the other room…man, El, it’s freaking 0500 in the morning, can I catch a break?)

Alright, I’m back. So the Thank List is a long one this year. This is the first time that I’ve ever typed in out in a public forum, but figured since this year gave me many firsts, it was only appropriate. Plus, I wanna see what the liner notes to my album would look like if I made an album that needed some liner notes. I’m gonna start off by sounding a bit like I just won the Super Bowl or a rapper winning a Grammy, but firstly, I’d like to thank God from whom all blessings flow. He gave me a lovely wife, a beautiful baby and has blessed me beyond what I often deserve. I’m thankful for my lovely wife for bringing us our first. Miss Ellison Jayne. Her incredible journey taught me so much about unconditional love, sacrifice, forgiveness and, most importantly, the wonderment of the family unit. To think that we never wanted a kiddo! I’m thankful for Dr. Miles Davis who was, oddly, our second choice, but he was available when we needed him and is the best obigen ever. I’m thankful for Ellison Jayne who has taught me about patience, how to laugh again, how to smile and talk like a woman with a really high voice. I’m thankful for that doctor who, in the madness of that day, I can’t remember his name, who called for more tests to be run on my lovely wife because he wasn’t satisfied with dismissing her chest pains as just muscular aches. You’re an angel and saved my lovely wife’s life. Your dedication to your job through the noise, the chaos and the frustration greatly blessed our family. I’m thankful for our entire family for their love, support, advice, polite correction and guidance. I’m thankful for our church family who was/is there at the drop of a hat. The Fellaship. The Barkers. The Rogers. The Johnsons. The Kneeses. The Allens. The Farrens. Of course, the Overstreets. Blake Collier. Or The Collier. The Canodes. I’m leaving tons of names out, still. I’m thankful for my mother for her eagerness to help, her wisdom as a Nana, her gentleness with my lovely wife and Ellison. I’m thankful for my father who is the best Grandpa any kid could ask for and drops everything if we need him. I’m thankful for my brother and sister-in-law. Not sure what we’d do without you all. Really. I’m thankful for friends and family that aren’t offended if I didn’t call you out specifically. Your understanding is why I keep you around. You got tough skin and I like that about you. I’m thankful for Funkadelic for offering me solace away from the madness. Your catalog is outstanding. I’m thankful for Kool Aid and your commitment to getting it done, even if it ain’t pretty. Your were a great marathon partner, homie. I’m thankful for two beagles who teach me how to control my rage and keep from popping off and either killing one of you or driving you out to the countryside and leaving you to fend for yourself…Jax. I’m thankful for Tux because he’s the best dog ever. Except for, of course, the eating feces thingy. We’re working on it, though. I’m thankful for coffee and for gastrointestinal fortitude that allows me to drink even the darkest variety without filling a commode with my insides. You gotta have coffee as a new parent. It’s necessary. Sorry, that was really gross. I’m thankful to Brandon Culp for his Casas por Cristo mission work and teaching me what it means to do the Lord’s work in circumstances beyond anything that I’ll likely ever know. You’re so wise and God has blessed you greatly. I’m thankful for the 2010 Red Sox who maintained mediocrity throughout the year (mainly through injuries…if everyone was healthy, domination would be ours) and made prioritization come September really easy. Let’s get ’em in 2011. Also, I’m thankful for the the 2010 Texas Tech Red Raiders who, under the blunderous babbling of Tuberville, we’ve stayed just above a losing year making it easy to turn the game off, but worth keeping it on in the case that there’s actually a game being played. Again, let’s work on next season. And, finally, I’m thankful for the 2010-11 Celtics who look just good enough to make another run at the title in June. Ya’ll hold that down and I’ll be working through this fatherhood thing. We’ll see you in June. Hopefully. I’m also thankful for the 2009-10 Celtics who proved you’re never too old, you’re never too slow and you’re never out of it. Fight like hell and make ’em recognize. I’m thankful for New Balance and the NB993. One great shoe. I’m thankful for the Ohio Players’ Observations in Time. Great album. I’m thankful for a job. I’m thankful for a roof over our heads and a warm heater. I’m thankful for Fela Kuti and his ability to calm a screaming baby. Well played, Fela.

Now, it’s time work on getting this turkey going. Sorry, I’ve been so distant lately. Busy week. Lovely wife celebrated a birthday. She’s Paul Pierce years old. Happy birthday, baby. Double shot of Girls are Cool tomorrow.


3 thoughts on “The Almighty Thank List

  1. dale says:

    I’m thankful for much. Raising Elle is one. J3 is another. The Wyrick Three rock. Actually, the Wyrick Five, but beagles are often left out. Peace (out).

  2. Violet Bishop says:

    I held on to every word. I had one with Colic. Not so bad. Inez had it and at that time Boyce was 4. He would stnd by my rocking chair and he was so sad. Finally he came to stand by me and looked up at me and said”Nom could we put her back and get another one?” I got two more and kept her,

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