Went in to officially end “GenderWatch 2010” (formerly SexWatch 2010) today.
Slept pretty good the night before. I was comfortable in that whatever was going to fly out of my lovely wife the mothership that day, it’s gonna be human. Sometimes that’s enough for me.
I had started this whole ordeal not wanting to know the gender of the baby until it arrived. I figured that I’m a sucka for torture, tension and endurance events and this would prove to be the biggest test yet. Studies had shown that 2 outta every 10 parents had decided to wait until the day of arrival and only 1 outta every 10 successfully waited. That would mean that only 5% of babies that are born each year arrive without knowing if there’s a penis on it or not. I figured too that it would retro the experience a little. You know, the “back when we had you” bidness where parents proudly proclaim on how they had no such conveniences. Turns out that it wasn’t really my decision to make. Kinda figured if the woman carrying the baby wants to know, there’s no reason we shouldn’t find out. It was a stupid idea anyway.
So here we are. Sitting out in the parking lot. At this point, I was holding to my assertion that all I really want is a healthy baby. The gender doesn’t really matter. Was definitely feeling a girl at this point, but figured if a boy came out, he’d have two boy cousins to get into fights with.
Grandma said we’d have a girl. Gommy said she hoped it was a boy because it’d be tall and she didn’t want a girl to be so tall.
We voted and “girl” won by one vote.
I dreamt of a girl twice.
Turns out, we’re giving birth to Skeletor from “Masters of the Universe.” This is the stuff that horror movies are made of.
The second photo was slightly more encouraging. That’s an eye socket, a nose, mouth and a hand to the face.
Then, there was the moment of truth. I guess this is why they get paid the big bucks. She called it a girl not once but twice. I’m now bothered by the additional space that was erroneously placed between the “I” and the “R.” Makes me think that possibly it could be rebuked later. Like is it official document if there’s an error in the spelling?
Gonna have to take her word for it because I didn’t see the outward unit. What I did see is that Ellison has my tibiae.
So those are the first official photos of baby Ellison. She’s a doosy, f’real.
Weighs 11 ounces and has a heart rate of 154. My lovely wife says she’s running in her belly. She’s gonna love me and my buggy.
Really, it was a pretty stupid idea to wait until the arrival to find out. Damn nice knowing we’re having a girl.